I’m going to talk about something very important in everybody’s life. Something that some of us have, some of us want, and some of us can’t figure out, that’s right, I’m going to talk about love. For some it’s a four letter word, for others its a three letter word, for me mostly it’s many many four letter words. Of course, I’m going to talk about this from a guy’s perspective, because, in case you haven't caught on yet, I am, in fact, a guy.
Odds are that at some moment in your life you will meet a girl. Not just any girl, a girl you fall head over heals in love with. Something will just click and you will know, she is the one for you and you were destined to be together. Then, a few seconds later you’ll meet her boyfriend. If your smart you’ll move on to the chick next to her, if your stupid, or a loser, you’ll hang around thinking that one day they’ll break up and you’ll be there to fill in the empty spot left by her previous boyfriend. Of course while your hanging around you’ll probably want to keep busy by playing the field a little, but that’s beside the point.
If you are lucky, or underhanded, one day the girl of your dreams and her boyfriend will break up, and if you are lucky enough, or she’s drunk enough, she will turn to you in her time of need, then you’re in like butter.
If you are not lucky, not underhanded, or a loser, this will never happen. Thus you will either spend the rest of your life alone, and a loser, or you will settle for the next best thing, and failing that, the next next best thing, and failing that, the next next next best thing, and so on down the line. If one day you do find that someone you can love, or just really want to procreate with, you may find yourself in a serious relationship. As time wears on and the relationship grows more serious you may begin to think about marriage. Most of these thoughts will be along the lines of, “No way in hell.”
Of course somewhere along the line your mind will change, or you will realize how to real your fear of becoming that forty year old bald guy trying to pick up college chicks in the bar is, and you will finally decide to ask the question. Suicide, or Marriage. Depending on how much you fear death you will either die here, or get married. And it is here were I will give my only advice:
Death is permanent
Marriage is not.
If this guy walked into a real court room people who aren't even on trial would start confessing to shit. Hell, it is taking all my willpower to not confess to all those banks I robbed back in 92. I tried going back and watching Law and Order before Jack McCoy came onboard, and honestly I don't know how they kept the show on the air for those first three seasons without him.
